The Relearning Blog

As an addict (smoking) in recovery, I spent a lot of time outside watching massive Toronto squirrels. Moving from the East Coast, I had never seen anything like them before. They are twitchy, resourceful and fast. Because they have to be. Just like us, they are living in a world as both predator and prey. You might be rolling your eyes and thinking “Humans are top of the food chain.” I can’t argue with that BUT I do think that as animals, humans feel less safe than we care to admit. Don’t believe me? If you let your mind roam for a minute or two, where does it go?

Are you:

Ruminating about a past conversation?

Anticipating something coming up today or this week?

Engaging in a hypothetical argument?

Struggling to get to sleep or stay asleep at night?

Judging or comparing yourself or your values to other people? 

Avoiding certain people, places or experiences? 

Beating yourself up over a mistake you made?

Repeating a conversation that was had? 

Over-analyzing a piece of feedback?

Becoming angry remembering something someone said or did?

Engaging in “what if” types of thoughts? 

If you sat peaceful and zen for a few minutes (no, disassociation and numbing do not count), I’m happy for you. If not, your mind might be working hard to keep you safe from perceived dangers. I know, I know, your performance evaluation or upcoming third date isn’t inherently dangerous yet here you are, thinking about it. 

All humans, all animals have things that they perceive as dangerous. These things might not be logically or rationally a threat to survival but the brain and body systems send off little alarm bells (cue anxiety, panic, insomnia, OCD, depression and other experiences) to keep us safe. Think of those squirrels who run away from people trying to feed them or just walking near them. The people did not have any intention of harming them and yet the squirrel ran because it is hardwired to seek safety even if it doesn’t make logical sense. We are just like those squirrels.

Yes we have access to logical reasoning, emotional regulation and complex reasoning, but we have to USE IT. 

If you are:

Imagining the future

Getting stuck in the past

Struggling to regulate your anger, excitement, and other emotions

Shutting down in conflict

Experiencing insomnia 

Avoiding conflict

Overthinking 

Feeling exhausted and like you are fried by the end of the day

Not being honest with yourself or others

Not advancing in your career or relationships the way you want to

(and many more human experiences)

The likelihood is that your Nervous System is stuck and you are not able to access those highly human traits of reasoning, regulation and other advanced human traits. Remember, just because we are wired to survive doesn’t mean we have to settle for survival. Through consistent practice and mental evolution,cognitive rewiring is possible. 

Being stuck is not the problem. It’s human to be stuck sometimes. Staying stuck might be the problem, and if it is, we are here to help. 

Want to take the next step? Reach out to us at co*****@re*************.com and we will do our best to support you. If you’re feeling nervous about the next steps and want to better understand the process, you can read Getting Started here.

Authored by Annie Amirault MSW, RSW, Psychotherapist & Co-Founder of ReLearning Human