A dedicated space to support your journey of relearning who you are and how you are wired

The Relearning Blog

no b.s. exercises

the exposed therapist
relationships
navigating change
emotional stuff
the self

Like starting any new process, there are many unknowns and uncertainties when finding a therapist. It can feel daunting, exciting, frustrating and downright defeating. Connecting with the right therapist can sometimes feel overwhelming and we hope to streamline the process for you. 

Maybe you have a specific goal of therapy in mind, that’s great. And, it’s totally fine if you don’t. Maybe you want a person trained in a specific modality or with specific lived experience, that’s fine. Maybe you just want to feel connected to the therapist, that’s fine too. 

Every person shows up to therapy in a different way. However you showing up is good enough. You don’t need to change anything about how you show up in therapy. There is no right or wrong way to engage in this process. Just show up as you are. 

Here is how to get the process started:

  1. You already have. Well done. Take a moment to acknowledge that you clicked on this post today and wherever you go from here is up to you. You are in the driver’s seat in this process. 
  1. Read through the bios (https://relearninghuman.com/starting-therapy#team)  Without thinking too hard – who do you feel drawn to? It could be their photo or the words they use. Connection points sometimes can’t be put into words and that’s OK. If you feel drawn to someone, great. If not, that’s OK too. Go onto step 3.
  1. Book a complimentary meet and greet with one or all of the therapists (https://relearninghuman.janeapp.com). You will have 15 minutes to get to know the therapist, ask any questions you might have or get a feel for the therapists’ general vibe. 
  1. If you have any questions, hesitations or want an in-between for steps 2 and 3, email us at co*****@re*************.com .

Thank you for considering therapy with ReLearning Human and in general. The world becomes a more connected place when we get to know ourselves a bit better. 

Authored by: Annie Amirault RSW, MSW & Co-founder of Relearning Human.

Getting Started

Navigating Change

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space lies our freedom to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom” – Viktor Frankl.

Your phone dings and you immediately check for a message while eating dinner with your family

You walk by a bakery and start salivating and tears come to your eyes before your brain clues into your memories of freshly baked bread 

You see crumbs on the floor and become angry at your roommates (is that just me?)

An email comes through and you immediately start thinking “it’s my day off, why are they emailing”  

As humans we are constantly observing and reacting to stimulus (sights, sounds, emotions, thoughts). When we are moving about life in a reactive state, there isn’t time or space for our logical mind to kick in. Reading this you might think “well, I’m pretty logical and self-aware, I don’t need therapy”.  Think again. 

If you sometimes:

  • Avoid conflict or shut down and retreat in conflict 
  • Feel defensive and criticized with feedback 
  • Blame other people or situations for your problems 
  • Have blow up fights (including hypothetical fights in your mind)
  • Replay conversations in your mind and overthink
  • Feel blindsided or surprised by other peoples actions 

You might not be as aware as you think and that’s OK. Very few people are intrinsically self aware (I’ve never met someone who is). You can practice self-awareness and see great changes  through this simple practice. 

Stop what you are doing 

  • When you feel yourself reacting – stop. Freeze. Say something like “I’m reacting” or “I’m reactive” (if you’re a nerd like me you can say “My amygdala has taken over”).

Take a breath – get our of your mind and into your body

  • Tune into your body and create intentionality around your breathing. Notice how your lungs expand and contract with every breath you take. Slow everything down. If your mind is racing, keep breathing and focusing on your breath until it starts to slow. 

Label what’s going on (this is the hardest part because we don’t like to feel those damn emotions) 

  • I feel angry, I feel anxious, I feel upset, I feel overwhelmed, I feel some kind of way 

Problem solve

This will look different for everyone. For me it includes breathing, prioritizing, asking for help, taking a break (2 mins), letting go of tasks, journaling, emailing my therapist in a panic, feeling through the emotion. 

Everyone’s process and problem solving will look different because we are all wired differently. What works for you might be detrimental for someone else. It’s important that you find a plan that works for you. Explore ReLearning Humans No B.S. Resources and team members anytime. You don’t have to do this alone, we are here to support when you are ready. 

Moving from reaction to response

No B.S. Exercises